Coercive control describes a pattern of behaviour used to dominate, isolate or intimidate a partner over time. It does not always involve physical violence, which is why it is often missed.
Common patterns
- Monitoring phones, messages, location or spending
- Isolating a partner from friends, family or work
- Threats, intimidation or punishing silence
- Controlling decisions about money, children or daily routines
- Rules that keep shifting, so the partner is always “wrong”
Why it matters before mediation
Mediation assumes both people can speak and negotiate freely. When one person has been living under control or fear, that assumption may not hold. Screening helps identify whether mediation is suitable, needs safety adjustments, or whether another process may fit better.
Considering a screening conversation?
Our IPV & Coercive Control Screening service offers a confidential, clinician-led conversation to help you understand your situation and possible next steps. Each person is screened separately, and you can share your safest way to be contacted.
Learn more about IPV & Coercive Control Screening →
If you are in immediate danger, call 911. For crisis lines and safety resources, visit Help Now.
Looking for self-paced survivor courses and resources? Visit linktr.ee/narcclinic.
This article is for general education and is not a diagnosis, legal advice or a substitute for individual clinical care.
National Center of Excellence for Intimate Partner Violence and Coercive Control is not a psychotherapy service.