Blogs(Page 17)

Blogs

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Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Clinic Canada™

Narcissistic Abuse Recovery and Family Mediation

You deserve relationships that feel safe — not familiar.

Founded by Raquel Soteldo, RP — Soteldo Psychotherapy Clinic

Book a 15-min Meeting with Raquel
Take the Narcissistic Abuse Assessment

If you’re unsure whether what you experienced was narcissistic abuse, emotional neglect, or trauma bonding, you’re not alone. Many people arrive here simply trying to make sense of patterns that felt confusing, painful, or destabilizing over time.

5+ years specializing in narcissistic family trauma • Thousands of clients supported • Trauma-informed, evidence-based

Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Clinic Canada™

Narcissistic Abuse Recovery and Family Mediation

You deserve relationships that feel safe — not familiar.

Founded by Raquel Soteldo, RP — Soteldo Psychotherapy Clinic

Book a 15-min Meeting with Raquel
Download the free ebook: Healing After Narcissistic Abuse
Take the Narcissistic Abuse Assessment

If you’re unsure whether what you experienced was narcissistic abuse, emotional neglect, or trauma bonding, you’re not alone. Many people arrive here simply trying to make sense of patterns that felt confusing, painful, or destabilizing over time.

hero-raquel-photo

5+ years specializing in narcissistic family trauma • Thousands of clients supported • Trauma-informed, evidence-based

Meet Raquel

Dissociation in Session – What Therapists Must Know

Survivors of narcissistic abuse often dissociate in session. They may go blank, lose track of time, or seem distant. New therapists sometimes mistake this for resistance or disengagement. In truth, dissociation is the nervous system’s way of saying, “This is too much.”Recognizing DissociationSigns include glazed eyes, long silences, or a sudden shift in tone. Survivors are not being difficult—they are protecting themselves.Therapeutic Response• Grounding – Use sensory cues like noticing feet on the floor or breathing.• Co-Regulation – Gentle voice and steady pacing help bring clients back.• Safety First – Never push survivors to stay present without providing tools for safety.Training PointTeach supervisees that dissociation is survival, not avoidance. Responding with patience, empathy, and skill fosters trust.👉 At Soteldo Psychotherapy Clinic, we train psychotherapists to recognize and respond to dissociation with trauma-informed care.

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September 3, 2025

Shame as a Core Wound of Narcissistic Abuse

Shame is one of the deepest wounds survivors carry. Narcissistic abusers deliberately plant shame, leaving clients believing “I’m not good enough” or “I’m the problem.”Understanding ShameUnlike guilt (“I did something bad”), shame says, “I am bad.” Survivors internalize years of criticism and gaslighting until shame becomes an identity. This often shows up as low self-esteem, depression, or difficulty forming safe relationships.Healing Approaches• Compassion-Focused Therapy – Teaching survivors to treat themselves with kindness.• Group Therapy – Hearing “me too” breaks shame’s isolation.• Trauma-Informed Care – Naming shame as a symptom of abuse, not truth.Final ThoughtShame does not belong to survivors—it belongs to the abuser. Therapy helps survivors hand it back and reclaim self-worth.👉 At Soteldo Psychotherapy Clinic, we help survivors transform shame into self-respect and resilience.

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September 3, 2025

Working With Survivors in Double Binds (For Psychotherapists)

Survivors of narcissistic abuse often present with chronic self-doubt. They lived in double binds: “You’re too emotional,” yet “You’re cold.” No matter what they did, it was wrong.The Impact of Double BindsThis impossible standard erodes confidence. Survivors internalize contradictory demands as evidence of personal failure. In therapy, they may struggle with indecision or feel they can “never get it right.”Clinical Strategies• Psychoeducation – Teach that double binds are tools of control.• Cognitive Restructuring – Highlight the impossibility of the abuser’s demands.• Empowerment Work – Encourage survivors to reject the trap and set boundaries.Training Application for PsychotherapistsSupervisees should learn to listen for the language of double binds in sessions and call them out explicitly. Survivors heal when they realize the contradiction was never their fault.👉 At Soteldo Psychotherapy Clinic, we train psychotherapists to dismantle double binds and restore survivor confidence.

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September 3, 2025

Naming Gaslighting – The Therapist’s Role

Gaslighting is one of the most destabilizing dynamics of narcissistic abuse. Survivors may enter therapy feeling confused, doubting their perceptions, and questioning their sanity. The therapist’s job is not to stay neutral—it’s to name the gaslighting.Why Naming MattersSurvivors already feel invalidated. If therapists avoid labeling gaslighting, clients may feel silenced again. A simple validation like, “What you’re describing is gaslighting,” can restore a sense of clarity and dignity.Therapeutic Tools• Reality Anchoring – Encourage clients to keep journals of conversations.• Psychoeducation – Explain how gaslighting erodes confidence.• Compassion Work – Reframe confusion as a symptom of abuse, not a flaw.Training InsightFor supervisees, emphasize that naming gaslighting is not “taking sides.” It’s trauma-informed care. Survivors need reality restored, not blurred further.👉 At Soteldo Psychotherapy Clinic, we empower psychotherapists to confidently identify gaslighting and help survivors reclaim their reality.

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September 3, 2025

Validating Memory Gaps in Survivors of Trauma (For Psychotherapists)

Many survivors of narcissistic abuse enter therapy worried about missing pieces of memory. They may say things like, “I don’t remember years of my life,” or “I can’t recall the details clearly.” New therapists sometimes panic, fearing exaggeration or unreliability. In truth, memory fragmentation is a common trauma response.Why Memory Gaps OccurTrauma overwhelms the nervous system. When the brain perceives danger, its priority is survival, not recording events in neat, linear detail. Dissociation—mentally “checking out” when stress becomes unbearable—can lead to lost or foggy memories. Survivors did not choose this. Their brains protected them.Clinical ApproachPsychotherapists should validate memory gaps instead of interrogating them. A compassionate statement like, “This is a normal trauma response,” reassures the client. Avoid pushing for details, which may retraumatize. Instead, focus on the emotions and meanings behind the gaps.Training TakeawayTeach trainees that the role of therapy is not to fact-check memories but to honor their impact. Survivors heal when their experience is believed and respected, regardless of precise recall.👉 At Soteldo Psychotherapy Clinic, we train psychotherapists to hold space for fragmented memories with skill and empathy.

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September 3, 2025

Projection in Narcissistic Abuse – Helping Survivors See Through the Lies

Projection is a classic tool of narcissistic abuse. The abuser accuses the survivor of the very things they are guilty of—lying, cheating, being selfish. Over time, survivors internalize these accusations.Why Projection WorksProjection shifts responsibility away from the abuser and onto the survivor. If the narcissist cheats, they accuse their partner of betrayal. This creates constant defense, self-doubt, and guilt.Therapy ApplicationTherapists must explicitly name projection and externalize it. Survivors need to hear: “These accusations were not about you—they were about them.” Encourage clients to separate identity from imposed guilt.Survivor EmpowermentOnce survivors understand projection, they can stop carrying blame that was never theirs. This insight is often described as “liberating.”👉 At Soteldo Psychotherapy Clinic, we help survivors dismantle projection and reclaim their authentic self.

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September 3, 2025